Lately, we’ve been taking an in-depth look at The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. We’ve looked at Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, and Quality Time. Let’s continue the study with the next Love Language, Receiving Gifts. When you and your partner know each other’s “language” it can improve the quality of your relationship by helping you show your partner love and appreciation in a way they’ll understand and accept. With the Love Language – Receiving Gifts, gifts become a visual and physical reminder that you’re thinking of them. Before you start thinking that you’ll need a second job to pay for gifts to show your love, it’s not about the cost of the gift instead it’s about the thought behind it. A nice card, a cup of coffee, a trinket from your business trip are all simple ways you can show love to Receiving Gifts partner.
Let’s take a look at the Receiving Gifts love language. How can you show love for your partner with gifts? And, if gifts are their love language, what does that mean?
Love Language #4 – Receiving Gifts
Receiving Gifts people love being spoiled with presents. Big or small, it doesn’t matter. They just want to know you’re thinking of them with gifts. They also take their gift-giving very seriously. They don’t just shop for any birthday gift, they want to find the perfect birthday gift that will fill the receiver with love and joy. They look for sentimental gifts, unusual gifts, and thoughtful gifts and they appreciate the same from you.
Finding the perfect gift for the special occasion or just any old Tuesday will let them know how much you love them. Here are a few ways to show love to your Receiving Gifts partner:
1.Keep your eyes open for small gifts
What does your partner like? Do they enjoy houseplants? A special kind of tea? Chocolates? Do they have a favorite store? Paying attention to the things your partner likes and giving it regularly shows how much you care. Even just bringing home their favorite candy bar lets them know you were thinking of them and you love them.
2. Every day’s a holiday
Don’t wait for a special holiday, make today a holiday. Celebrate that it’s Friday, celebrate a great idea, celebrate that the sun is shining. Any reason for giving gifts is a good one. You may be surprised that there are a number of holidays you may not be aware of like National Pizza Day, National Thrift Shop Day, and National Name Your Car Day. A quick Google search of national holidays for the month will give you a reason to celebrate. In addition to small gifts, you can plan a special day of your own. Give your holiday a name and a theme, choose activities and foods for it, then have fun celebrating
If you travel for business without your partner, let them know you missed them while you were away by bringing home a small souvenir from your trip for them. It doesn’t need to be anything big, just a small reminder that you were thinking of them.
4.Make special occasions and holidays a big deal
A gift person is going to go all-out for holidays like birthdays, anniversaries, and Christmas and they expect the same of you. If you don’t make these days extra special, with extra special, thoughtful gifts, they’ll be broken hearted so make sure you go big.
That doesn’t necessarily mean “spend a lot of money” yet it does mean “put a lot of thought into your gift.” Anniversaries are a special reminder of your commitment and love. Birthdays are your partners day to be celebrated for the person they are. These are two very important occasions and they deserve a lot of extra attention.
The most important thing is that the gifts come from the heart. Even if you can’t spend a lot, put a lot of thought into it, get creative, make something special, find a special way to wrap the gifts, and give your sweetie a reason to be excited
5. Give gifts for emotional reasons too
Did your partner have a bad day at work? Did the two of you have a fight? Is your partner struggling with their confidence? A gift will let them know you’re thinking of them, you support them, and, if necessary, you’re sorry. Little tokens of your love and support will brighten their mood and lift their spirits. Again, it doesn’t have to be anything big, just something to let them know you’re thinking of them.
6. Make it a habit
Don’t get lazy with your gift giving or your partner will think you don’t love them as much anymore. Make a habit of giving gifts and keep it up. Bring flowers home every Friday or make coffee every morning. And make sure the gift is thoughtful and loving. Unless your sweetie absolutely loves cleaning house, don’t buy a new vacuum cleaner and call it a gift. Know your partner and what they love so you can choose appropriate gifts that will be well received.
If you or your partner speaks the Receiving Gifts Love Language, here’s what you need to know:
- Make the gift personal and heartfelt.
- Know what your partner likes and dislikes so you can make good gift choices.
- If you don’t enjoy buying gifts or don’t feel like you’re good at it, ask for help from someone who is.
- If you’re still not sure, ask your sweetie what they like and what makes them happy. Let them know that you want to bring them gifts to show love, yet you’re just not sure what they’d like. Don’t worry, they’ll be happy to tell you.
- Always be on the lookout for special gifts. You don’t have to give them as soon as you find them, you can hold on to them until the right moment, however always looking for special gifts will make it easier.
The most important factor is that the gift comes from the heart and that it’s chosen specifically for your Receiving Gifts partner. A random no-thought gift will have the same effect as no gift at all and will leave your partner feeling unloved.
Always ask your partner if they like your gifts when you give them. Even though they may say “yes”, if they don’t really like it, you’ll hear “no” in their tone of voice. When you first start giving gifts, this will help you learn what makes your partner happy and what they don’t really like.
And remember that you don’t need a special occasion for a gift. A thoughtful gift given because it’s Tuesday can sometimes mean more and be more special than a birthday gift. The gift is about showing your partner in a non-verbal way that you love them, admire them, support them, and encourage them. It tells them that you’re thinking of them and they’re special to you. It doesn’t have to be expensive, in fact some of the best gifts are very inexpensive, it just has to let them know that they’re in your thoughts all the time.
Learning each other’s love languages and how to speak them helps to build your relationship on a solid foundation. It allows you to show your love for each other with more than just “I love you.” If you don’t know your language or your partner’s, you can both take the personality test on The 5 Love Languages website. Most couples have different love languages from each other so it’s important to understand how each of you feels loved and valued.
Communicating with your partner with their love language will help them to feel loved, appreciated, and understood, making your relationship much stronger. If you’re showing love for your partner using your own love language instead of theirs, chances are they’re not understanding what you need, and they’re feeling disconnected from you.
Showing love in your partner’s love language will tell them just how much you care. Taking the time to learn their love language so that you can communicate love in a way they can understand and appreciate it will make them feel like the most important person in the world to you. Aren’t they worth that?
As we continue moving forward to look at the final love language, take some time to see how you and your partner relate to each and which love language best describes you. Communicating to each other in your own love languages will strengthen your bond and help you feel more connected to each other by showing love in a way that it can be best received.
If you missed the previous posts about Words of Affirmation – Language 1, Acts of Service – Love Language 2, or Quality Time – Language 3, be sure to check the blog to learn more about them. Remember, if you want to know what your love language is, you can take the test at The 5 Love Languages website.